How to achieve your goals in life...

I recently mentioned a book by Heidi Grant called Nine Things Successful People Do Differently (see my post, "Be an optimist without being a fool").  Dr. Grant also wrote an article for Harvard Business Review with the same title which summarizes the book.  The book version is relatively short at just 112 pages, so I'd recommend taking a little extra time to read the book instead of the article.  I promised then that I would get back to her "nine things" in a future post, so that is just what I am going to do in today's post.  

While there are a number of definitions for the word goal, the best that I've heard is one from Ayelet Fischbach, who defined goals as mental representations of desired states.  Goals describe our idea of how we would like things to be in our personal and/or professional lives.  Dr. Grant's HBR article (and book) focus specifically on the nine things that successful people do in order to achieve their personal and professional goals.

1. Get specific  

I've mentioned the SMART goal framework in the past (see, for example, my post from 2016, "Goooooaaallll!").  Recall that "SMART" is an acronym, with the S standing for Specific.  When you set a goal, it's better to be as specific as possible.  For example, rather than setting a goal to "lose weight", be more specific and set a goal to "lose 10 pounds."  Leave no question or ambiguity about what it is that you are trying to achieve.

2. Seize the moment to act on your goals

As I mentioned in a recent post ("Only the disciplined ones are free in life..."), achieving our personal and professional goals in life requires discipline.  We have to take advantage of every opportunity to act on our goals.  Dr. Grant again recommends being as specific as possible.  We should decide what action we will take to achieve our goals, as well as when and where we will take each action.  She suggests using "If...then" statements.  For example (and I will continue to use the example goal, "Lose 10 pounds in 3 months"), "If it's Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, I will work out for 30 minutes every morning before going to work."

3. Know exactly how far you have left to go

Assuming we have adopted the SMART goal framework, we can monitor the progress to achieving our goal (remember that the M stands for Measurable).  Dr. Grant says, "If you don't know how well you are doing, you can't adjust your behavior or strategies accordingly."  In her book, she discusses the difference between using a "To Go" versus a "To Date" framing.  I plan to discuss this topic in an upcoming post soon, but simply stated with a "To Go" framing, you count how much work, time, or distance remains until you reach the end (goal achievement).  Conversely, with a "To Date" framing you count how much work, time, or distance you have already completed up to a specific point in time.  As it turns out, our level of motivation to continue to push towards the end of our goal depends upon whether we use a "To Go" versus a "To Date" framing.  Whether we use either framing, Dr. Grant's point here is that we should know exactly how far we've come and how far we've left to go to reach our goal.

4. Be a realistic optimist

I recently posted about a concept known as realistic optimism (see again, "Be an optimist without being a fool").  Particularly when we set so-called "stretch goals", it's important that we have the confidence in our ability to achieve the goals that we set for ourselves.  However, it's equally important that we are realistic about those same abilities.  Studies consistently show that if we think that it will be easy and effortless to achieve our goals, not only will be less prepared when the "going gets tough", we will significantly increase the odds of failure.  It's better to believe in ourselves AND know that it will require a lot of effort, commitment, and dedication.

5. Focus on getting better, rather than being good

We should have what Carol Dweck calls a "growth mindset" (as opposed to a "fixed mindset"), which she defines as a belief that intelligence, abilities, and talents are not fixed traits but can be developed through dedication, effort, and a willingness to learn. We should focus on continuously improving ourselves by adopting a growth-mindset as opposed to a fixed mindset.

6. Have grit

I've posted a lot about Angela Duckworth and her TED talk that was based upon a research study that she published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology ("Grit: Perseverance and passion for long-term goals").  She later wrote a book (Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance) that quickly made it to the New York Times bestseller list.   The book was interesting, but if I were to be completely honest, the research study and TED talk were just as impactful (and shorter).  We often, for good reason, use the words resilience, perseverance, and grit interchangeably.  Dr. Grant says that grit is a willingness to commit to long-term goals and to persist, even in the face of adversity.  Importantly, grit is something that we can develop over time.    

7. Build your willpower muscle

I've posted about the famous "Stanford marshmallow experiment" in the past (see "Life is a marshmallow - easy to chew but hard to swallow"), as well as a similar study involving marshmallows, radishes, and will power by Roy Baumeister (see "What do I know of man's destiny? I could tell you more about radishes").  Basically, these studies tell us that will power and self-control are a lot like our muscles in that we have to exercise them in order to keep them strong.  In order to build self-control and will power, start out with small, challenging tasks that build over time to bigger and even more challenging tasks.

8. Don't tempt fate

If our will power and self-control are like muscles, we need to recognize that muscles can become fatigued with overuse.  We shouldn't try to take on two challenging tasks at the same time (for example, quitting smoking and losing weight at the same time).

9. Focus on what you will do, not what you won't do

Replace bad habits with good habits.  If your goal is to lose 10 pounds, frame what you will do in the positive as opposed to the negative.  For example, "I will walk 30 minutes every morning" as opposed to "I will sitting on the couch and watching TV."

Dr. Grant makes a number of great points here.  Collectively, these "nine points" will help you to set not only the right kinds of goals for yourself, but also they will help you successfully achieve them.  As mentioned above, next time I will talk a little more about the research on using a "To Do" versus a "To Date" framing when measuring progress towards goal achievement.