Last October (see my post "Connections"), I mentioned a great online article ("How '6 points of connection' can repair our shared trust") by the social entrepreneur Aaron Hurst, who recently co-founded the U.S. Chamber of Connection. The U.S. Chamber of Connection is a movement to reverse the decline in connection and trust in society today, something that they call the connection gap. They have called this connection gap the greatest challenge of our time, stating that "We are divided and disconnected. It is destroying lives, communities, and our country." In the article, Hurst talked about how the six points of connection can help restore trust in society. Notably, Hurst's fourth point of connection is what are known as third places.
Sociologist Ray Oldenburg first coined the term third place in his 1989 book Great Good Place. If the first place is your home and the second place is your place of work, then the third place describes the places you go to spend time with friends and family, such as church, cafes, bars, clubs, gyms, parks, etc. Oldenburg argued that these third places are important not only for a sense of place and belonging, but also for civic engagement and, more generally, democracy. Oldenburg co-authored the 2023 edition of the book with Karen Christensen. Christensen makes the argument that third places are the answer to our current epidemic of loneliness, political polarization, and even climate resilience.
Howard Schultz, founder and former CEO of Starbucks, famously wanted to turn his coffee shops into a third place (see my post "It's not about the coffee..."). He once described his vision, saying, "The idea was to create a chain of coffeehouses that would become America's third place. At the time, most Americans had two places in their lives - home and work. But I believed that people needed another place, a place where they could go to relax and enjoy others, or just be by themselves. I envisioned a place that would be separate from home or work, a place that would mean different things to different people."
Unfortunately, third spaces are disappearing across the United States. As recently as 2019, nearly two-thirds of all Americans could name a regular, local third place. However, that number has dropped to just over half in 2022. An American Social Capital Survey from 2024 indicated that 63% of adults rarely or never visit a library. Half rarely or never visit a park. More than 1 in 5 Americans live in communities with no access to third spaces like parks, libraries, or community centers. And, as I mentioned in a recent post ("The fox, the hound, and the body..."), a Dutch study on changes in personal relationships strongly suggests that the loss of third places is an important reason why many personal relationships fade with time.
There are several reasons that can potentially explain the loss of third spaces in society today. Certainly, suburban sprawl has pushed individuals further away from commercial and social hubs that are often located in the downtown areas of cities. Americans are also spending more time at home in general, and frequently that time is spent alone. I've also posted a lot about the role that television (see "Amusing Ourselves to Death"), technology (see "The Walkman Effect", "The Quiet Commute", and "Take a Break...") and social media (see "Familiarity breeds contempt...", "Liberation", and "The truth about connection") have played with the growing trend to spend time alone. I think we can easily make the argument that the more time we spend on technology (e.g. smart phone, Internet) or social media, the less time we are connecting with others (friends, family, etc).
With all of this in mind, Aaron Hurst makes an important point in his article on the six points of connection. Hurst writes, "Third places matter because they invite spontaneous connection - between generations, across cultures, and beyond our usual social circles. They're where we bump into each other, strike up conversations, and build trust without needing an invitation."
He goes on to suggest, "The simplest and most powerful action is to show up. Visit your local third places regularly. Stay a little longer. Learn the names of the baristas or librarians. Say yes to the community event. When we consistently support these spaces, we keep them alive — and signal that connection matters."
For those so-called civic deserts, communities that lack third places, Hurst suggests that we should become advocates by "asking for benches, plazas, or gathering spots." A lot of this is under our direct control, if we work together to spend time together. Together, we can restore our third places, and as a direct result, improve the quality of our own lives and of those around us.
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