"What does not kill me makes me stronger..."

Long before American pop singer Kelly Clarkson said it, the 19th century German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said "What does not kill me makes me stronger."  Whenever I hear this quote, my mind goes back to my high school Physical Education teacher, who first taught me "the principle of progressive overload".  Simply stated, if you want to get better at anything, you have to push yourself past your zone of comfort.  For example, if you want to build up your muscle strength so that you can increase your maximum bench press, add 5-10 pounds to your bench press work-out every few days.  Alternatively, if your goal is to run a marathon, start out with running one long run every Saturday and add 1 mile every week.  Slowly but surely, over time, you will build up your muscle strength (so you can bench press a couple of hundred pounds) or increase your stamina to the point where you can run that marathon.

Not surprisingly, "the principle of progressive overload" applies to more than just sports and exercise.  If you are afraid to speak in public, you have to challenge yourself by actually starting to speak in public.  You should start out with something relatively short, maybe giving a toast at a dinner with friends.  As you gain confidence and with further practice and experience, you can eventually challenge yourself with a speech in front of a small crowd.  

The same principle applies to leadership.  Sarah Horn starts off her recent article for Forbes magazine, "Why Discomfort Builds Better Leaders" by stating, "In today’s hyper-optimized world, comfort and convenience are often prized. But in doing so, we may evade the very experiences that enable deep leadership growth...Uncomfortable or challenging experiences teach leaders to perform under pressure, nurture teamwork in adversity, and recover quickly after failure.  This creates a virtuous cycle: mastering setbacks builds confidence and resilience, which enables faster progression and greater impact, which in turn attracts more growth opportunities."

Horn references a study by Kaitlin Woolley and Ayelet Fishbach, published in the journal Psychological Science ("Motivating personal growth by seeking discomfort").  Over two thousand study participants participated in five studies in which they intentionally and actively sought out personal discomfort - by taking improvisation classes, engaging in creative writing, or even exploring alternative political viewpoints.  These study participants consistently reported greater perceived goal achievement, engagement, and personal long-term growth.  

Horn writes, "Leaders who cognitively engage with discomfort learn to understand their limits, recognize their triggers, and manage their responses when stakes are high."  When they push and challenge themselves beyond their personal zone of comfort, they learn how to deal better with uncertainty, anxiety, and fear.  She continues, "The key is intentionality. Hardship does not automatically create better leaders. However, deliberately chosen challenges – whether physical, emotional, or intellectual – can strengthen neural pathways that serve leaders in high-stakes situations."

Rather than being afraid to challenge ourselves, we should embrace the opportunity to push ourselves and learn, grow, and develop.  When we take risks and move out of our own personal comfort zone, we will likely fail.  But when we fail, we learn, grow, and develop into better leaders.  Even if she didn't say it first, Kelly Clarkson maybe said it best, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!"