What is your lighthouse?

In a recent post ("A life with meaning and purpose..."), I mentioned a recently published study that found that having a purpose in life was the key to living a longer, healthier, happier life.  How can we find our purpose?  I also mentioned the neurologist, psychologist, and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl, who wrote perhaps one of the greatest books that I've ever read, Man's Search for Meaning.  Frankl wrote, "Those who have a why to live can bear with almost any how."    

It's helpful to define "purpose" at the outset.  Dr. Leah Weiss, who teaches about compassionate leadership at Stanford University's Graduate School of Business writes about the need for "Purpose with a capital P" in her book, How We Work: Live Your Purpose, Reclaim Your Sanity, and Embrace the Daily Grind.  While "purpose could be any direction in which we're heading with some degree of intention", "Purpose with a capital P" describes a far-reaching goal that is "personally meaningful and self-transcending that, ideally, shows up in our lives every day."  She writes on that "Purpose has impact only if we sincerely care about it."

Jane Ferré defined "purpose" in a slightly different way in her blog post, "What is your lighthouse?"  She mentions the lighthouse in Albion on the western coast of the island of Mauritius (recently proclaimed as "the most beautiful lighthouse in the Southern Hemisphere") and reminds us that the word "lighthouse" is defined as "a tower or other structure containing a beacon light to war or guide ships at sea."  She then asks the question, "Have you worked out what it is that guides you when you are out at sea?"  The lighthouse is a beautiful metaphor for our purpose in life.  Even during the most difficult times, our purpose, just like a lighthouse, will serve as a beacon of hope to guide us to safer waters.  Unfortunately, not everyone can confidently say that they have a clear sense of purpose in life.

According to a study ("Well-being assessment: An Evaluation of Well-Being Scales for Public Health and Population Estimates of Well-Being among US Adults") published in the journal Applied Psychology: Health and Wellbeing, only about 1 in 4 adults living in the U.S. strongly endorse having a clear sense of purpose in their lives, and almost 40% of adults are either neutral or say that they don't have a clear sense of purpose.  Given what we know about the impact of living a purpose-filled life on health, this seems like an incredible opportunity.

Amy Morin, writing for Verywellmind.com provided seven tips for finding your purpose (note that Dr. Weiss provides a very similar list of steps in her book):

1. Donate time, money, or talent.  Spending time helping others is a great way to add meaning to your daily life.

2. Listen to feedback.  Sometimes, our friends and family can help us identify what we our passionate about doing.

3. Surround yourself with positive people.  We can draw inspiration from the positive people that we associate with in our personal and professional lives.

4. Start conversations with new people.  Establishing connections with others can help inspire us to be better as individuals.

5. Explore your interests.  Morin (and others) recommend cataloging our activities or journaling to help us identify what we are good at and what we are passionate about - hopefully those two things overlap.

6. Consider injustices that bother you.  Identifying with an important cause can help us find our purpose.

7. Discover what you love to do.  Try to identify what type of skills or special talents that you have and whether these can be aligned with your passions (see the Japanese concept of Ikigai).  Then think about how you can turn that passion into something meaningful to you. 

Dr. Dhruv Khullar, writing for The New York Times ("Finding Purpose for a Good Life.  But Also a Healthy One"), adds the important caveat that "finding purpose is rarely an epiphany, nor is it something you pick up at the mall or download from the app store.  It can be a long, arduous process that requires introspection and conversation, then a commitment to act."  At the end of the journey, you will likely find that "the key to a deeper, healthier life isn't knowing the meaning of life - it's building meaning into your life."  

How do we know when we've finally found our purpose in life?  Amy Morin writes, "Ultimately, you've likely found your purpose if you've stopped asking whether you have."  Once you find your lighthouse, you've found your way home.